Early on in my sales career I was elected into a management position based on my performance in sales.

I was excited and at the same time not sure what to expect.

Now I know we have all heard the phrase, "Not all good sales people make good managers and not all managers make good sales people." Well, lets just say I believe some people can learn.

Unfortunately I was one of those people that had to learn the hard way.

I found myself in charge of several people that were twice my age (I was in my early twenties) and in places in their lives that found them along with their egos being checked by someone who was a much younger age.

Many of them of course did NOT like that.

Now rest assured I knew my sales job inside and out and that is one of the reasons I was put in the position but I wasn't the best at communicating the process to the team. I had little empathy for their learning curve of the position.

I found myself demanding respect of the team because I had such a lucrative sales career with the company and was "obviously" put in the management position because I knew the process. Of course that is at least what I was thinking at that time.

You're probably thinking to yourself, "Yup, I can tell you were a jack ass alright!"

Well that was mistake #1. Demanding anything of anyone who is in a 100% commission position is anything short of silly. Egos are at play here and if you think anything different you're mistaken.

Demanding a level of excellence is one thing. Demanding people act, do and handle things in a certain way goes against their personal creativity & personality in the sales process. That gives them a sense of satisfaction and enjoyment in sales to begin with along with the financial results too of course.

Let me give you my insight into the difference of commanding and demanding the respect of your team:

1. Commanding respect is made up of your posture. You can be confident of yourself and have a level of excellence that you strive for. You "set the bar" so to speak and you live up to that bar each and every day. People can just pick up on this believe me. It is an air of confidence about you that must not be confused with being egotistical.

You lead by example in your actions and attitude and you lead your team in a way that you would want to follow yourself. I now today know I will not ask of my team what I'm not willing or capable of doing myself. They know this and willingly follow as we develop them and their leadership skills as well.They know I have their best interest at heart.

2. Demanding respect is thinking people should follow your every whim and word just because you're in a position of leadership. Expecting people to do your bidding just because you have a title. This is where I found myself very early on and quickly I experienced the fact that people did not like it.

Regardless I learned that respect was earned even if you had a title.

Titles don't make people. People make the title. I like to say you're sailing a ship of leaders and your at the helm. Hence the word leadership. Be careful where you sail so that you don't lead everyone into a battle you can't win.

Empower your people. Let know know by your actions and your words that you have their best interest at heart.

Know there is a fine balance between having empathy for your teams learning ability and expecting a level of work ethic and excellence on their part. They can be inspired by you, your actions and your words or torn down by them just as fast.